Quotes from the Queendom

they make dumplings so good, that when i die, i want one in my mouth when i'm in the coffin.

D: Auntie Amy, do you like to put your head on the cold place on the pillow?

A: I do! How about you?

D: Yea, I chase it around all night.

Because of their insane realism my GHG life-size floaters give my crew an edge when we're on pressured honkers!

In the extreme temperatures, the flavors got lost. It's the warm-middle where the flavor is.

M to guy behind the counter at the video store: What is your job title?

G: Clerk.

M: How do you define "clerk?" Like, why not "customer service person?"

G: We do it all. Customer service, retail....and we check you out.

M: Gimme a pen, I gotta write that down.

Hey my hot-rod just passed a smog test today! Maybe after we take in some nature, we could do donuts in a Mill Valley culdesac.

impatience is a sign you've stopped using your imagination.

We can't lock people up for swallowing nails...

a conversation between two buddhists:

Community Mental Health Client: Are you my neighbor?

Me: No, I'm not your neighbor.

Client: Then, I can't love you as myself.

Me: I am yourself.

trees prove infinity.

That's very clevah pixie behavior.

and next on we have your girlfriend's favorite dj! give it up for DJ SMOOVE!

From dark, curly haired, tall, juicy-looking, probably 17-year-old boy behind the counter as he looks at his celly phone...

HIM: Do you get service out here?

ME: Yea, I guess so, I just switched to brand C.

HIM: That's who I have too, well, my dad does and he just got the family plan. Did you know with Plan C, you can get myspace updates? It's so great, you get alerted when you get comments or mail or anything like that.

ME: Yea? I'm more of a Yahoo IM'er, myself. Not on myspace much.

HIM: Yea, I'm Mavrick_Hunter on myspace. It's so cool, at the Phoenix in Petaluma, all the hipsters write their myspace addresses on the bathroom walls....

ME: Alright, Mavrick_Hunter, have a great Saturday.

Me: Exit.

Jon: You know where to go for some good country records?

Mac: Marin. Village Records.

Albert Camus wrote that the only serious question is whether to kill yourself or not...There is only one serious question and that is: Who knows how to make love stay? Answer me that and I will telll you whether or not to kill yourself.